Talk Less, Listen More

 
I've been thinking about listening, even when I'm trying to listen. That's kind of funny to me and maybe you but not so funny for the person talking to me – unless they're one of those types that do lecture-style monologues and become unaware of whether one is listening or not (being heard is an art too). My point is listening takes effort.
 
I'm sure you're aware of patiently waiting for your turn to say that super important thing that has popped into your mind and doing your best to not lose it whilst missing some of the conversation. Or worse, just barging on in anyway and saying it. I get so frustrated with my beloved when he interrupts. I feel negated, unimportant and sometimes even used. In fact, it probably triggers some older wounds which is a whole other story. I am sure there's also an aspect of myself I am annoyed with, because I too have trouble listening.
 
Here's an alarming statistic – most of us are distracted or preoccupied about 75% of the time when someone is talking to us and immediately after we only recall about 50% of what was said (and long term it's only 20%!).
 
Collectively, I believe, we need greater mindfulness, focus and concentration –not just to make us better listeners, but to make us better people.
 
Here are some benefits to listening:

• When you truly listen you have a greater connection to your authentic self.

 

• You can intuitively connect in with what is happening on a deeper level for the person speaking.

 

• Increased self-esteem and confidence – you feel good about yourself by gifting someone your full attention.

 

• Increased ability to focus and concentrate.

 

• Taming the ego mind by being fully present.

 

• Feeling connected to the 'other'.

 

• Increased patience and tolerance.

 
Benefits to being heard:

• Feeling connected to one's self.

 

• Feeling connected to the 'other'.

 

• Brain studies show that sharing feelings lessens their intensity – that means healing is happening.

 

• Studies have also shown increased happiness.

 

• Greater ability to resolve conflict.

 

• Feeling valued and cared for.

 

• Feeling a sense of belonging.

 
 
Observe yourself, become the witness to what your thoughts are up to when someone is talking to you, gently bring yourself back to the present and practise listening.
 
 
Wishing you centred listening
 
with light
Dawn
 

Image by RitaE on Pixabay