I believe we all have varying degrees of trauma. There are no perfect childhoods. Our care givers did things the only way they knew how to at the time. Their actions were based on their own history. Being human means we make mistakes and can operate unconsciously from ego, fear and conditioning. As adults our intellect can make sense of that yet understanding trauma does not heal it.
 
The spiritual truth that we create our lives to learn the lessons we are drawn to work on doesn't heal trauma either. It too helps us understand yet fear and deep emotion are still trapped in our physical cells causing us an array of issues.
 
The way we internalise events varies depending on our sensitivities and circumstances. The bottles of paint I accidentally knocked down creating a major colourful mess while helping a teacher when I was 7 is not what many would perceive as traumatic yet I was overwhelmed with emotion I didn't know how to cope with. Those less sensitive or more emotionally intelligent may have laughed and rolled with it. That experience certainly wasn't life threatening like other traumatic situations I was involved in yet it did bring about some internalised shame.
 
Trauma has been defined as the result of an overwhelming amount of stress that exceeds one's ability to cope, or integrate the emotions involved with that experience. I have been working on deactivating my own wound up, deeply buried inner turmoil for many years so I have come to know the nature of trauma well.
 
Lately I've noticed that others are having spontaneous trauma memories appearing. It seems we are collectively ready to handle the truth of our past so we can make peace with it for a healthier, happier life.
 
Unhealed trauma creates –

• Anxiety
• Addiction (being busy, eating, drinking, over thinking, working, gaming, exercising etc... as ways to avoid one's feelings. It's rampant.)
• Relationship issues
• Blame and judgement
• Depression
• Body pain and tension
• Over reactions
• Sexual issues
• Money problems
• Lack of self esteem
• Shame
• Health problems

 
There's more I could add to that list but you get the idea. Trauma is affecting our lives adversely and stopping us from living to our full potential.
 
Here's what needs to happen for healing to come about –

• Be present to uncomfortable feelings

 

• Stay with your bodily experience

 

• Resist analysing – it will disconnect you from your body

 

• Experience the emotion that wants to move – it is old, trapped energy that was not allowed space to be expressed

 

• Be patient with yourself, trauma healing is a process

 

• Know that timing is everything – you must have a safe space to be vulnerable when trauma is ready to be unlocked. (people who can listen, understand, be empathic and give you room to feel are valuable)

 

• You also need a particular level of psychological maturity to be courageous enough to allow painful emotion to release from your body

 
 
Trust what is occurring. Don't be annoyed that there is more to heal. Healing is a long, long journey. It isn't a few workshops and sessions, nor is it one big purge and it's all done. We have a lot to make peace with. Go gently and kindly. Life is a play; the game gets easier as we make room for more light in our body. Be brave and loving.
 
Wishing you gentleness on your healing journey
 
with light
Dawn

Image by Alexas_Fotos on Pixabay

I recently experienced a new memory from a long ago incident. It was the sudden and shocking type of recollection that requires time to process. I spent the week thinking, feeling, regressing, trying to not to analyse, feeling some more and gradually integrating this once buried wound.
 
During that week I was teaching healers how to support their clients by working with the wounded inner child. How perfect for me! They too experienced new memories, and, like myself, they were too young to recall it all and had no witnesses. The few days that followed had me encountering 3 others that also realised a partial disturbing memory.
 
Healers have always been called to make peace with themselves and their history. With their wisdom, experience and maturity they can now go even deeper. It takes courage and divine timing to be ready for aspects of trauma to come forward in a way that isn't intellectual. Buried feelings like shame and terror need strong holding from a support person or one's own compassionate adult self. When we are stuck in a child like memory it can be scary and ungrounding.
 
If you too have been triggered somehow into a past memory know this is a good thing. Your system is wanting to heal. Our nerves and tissue hold trauma, our pain and tension is usually based in unexpressed emotions from long ago.
 
When your higher self knows you are ready to finally process something old then memories will come. When they arrive in a way where you are feeling it physically, emotionally and energetically it can be surprising and confusing, especially when you have no recollection of the event. Don't let your bossy mind try to analyse it, it will stop you feeling and prolong the healing. I know the wanting to understand it thing, it's an easy default. Thinking isn't healing though, it blocks emotions like anger, sadness and grief.
 
Have the courage to feel painful emotions and be patient. Despite what you think or are told you don't need to know the whole story, regardless of how much your mind wants to understand it. Having no witnesses for past trauma can be frustrating and perplexing, yet if you are meant to know more the images and information will be come in the right time. Trust what is happening on a non intellectual level. You ARE healing.
 
As we release the hold on old emotions and thought patterns that no longer serve us we become more authentic, and that means a happier, easier life.
 
Tips for this kind of experience -

• Don't think, feel.
• Get support if you are feeling stuck.
• Do grounding practices.
• Be kind to yourself.
• Practise self compassion
• Be patient, healing takes time.
• Remember this is not a bad thing, you are healing, it is a good thing!

 
 
Wishing you kindness
 
with light
Dawn
 
 
 Photo by Yousef Espanioly