Here's an inspiring quote from a fave teacher of mine, Edward Bach that's been on my wall for years. Edward was a doctor, homeopath and spiritual writer as well as the founder of the Bach Flower Remedies back in the early 1900's. This quote is from 1931.
"Our object in life is to follow the dictates of our Higher Self, undeterred by the influence of others. This can only be achieved if we gently go our own way - at the same time never interfere with the personality of another."
I love this wisdom. If only we all did this, all of the time! What a different world it would be. I want to break down the guidance in this helpful quote.
Wise Bit 1 -
"Our object in life is to follow the dictates of our Higher Self, undeterred by the influence of others.''
I think it's quite a skill to listen to our own inner wisdom and not be distracted by what everyone else is saying and doing. When we allow our egos, rather than our Higher Self (the wise, spiritual aspect of our being) to take control we compare ourselves to others, want what others have, think we aren't doing it right, believe we're not good enough and suffer from all manner of fearful thoughts and frustrations.
Wise Bit 2 -
"...if we gently go our own way..."
What simple, clear guidance. No rushing, no pushing, no someone else's way. Gently is such a peaceful, out breath kind of word; I feel calm just thinking about gently going my own way.
Wise Bit 3 -
"...never interfere with the personality of another."
This is all about boundaries. It makes me think of 'mind your own business' - a classic effective boundary statement. We do get quite invasive with those close to us in particular. We need to remember everyone has their own path, your way is not necessarily the right way for someone else. We can be there for others when they ask for support or help, but interfering and giving advice is control, not love.
I hope you find this quote from nearly 90 years ago helpful, I know I do.
Image by Imagine_Images on Pixabay
Is life challenging you right now? If you are having a dandy old time of it lately then skip down the page to some wise words from The Dalai Llama for when you're next feeling stuck.
I'm feeling challenged just now. In fact it appears I am driving myself crazy as well as those close to me! After the fact I realised I was projecting some of my own frustration onto my kid which he was able to point out. Being parented by my 11 yo is one of those helpful not helpful things. Upon reflection I realise I'm feeling pressured and it's mainly pressure from myself.
When the path ahead is unclear our egos want control. This can have us demanding, worrying and stressing. When those things happen they can result in arguments, misunderstandings, headaches, addiction, body tension and, well, add a few of your own, there are loads of unhelpful and unhealthy by products.
Security and safety issues are common things that challenge us. We can easily become ungrounded when fear is up around these things. Being stuck in our head or somewhat 'out of it' doesn't lead to flow or forward movement with ease. We act from an unbalanced place. This is when we need to slow down, breathe, get grounded, connect to Higher Intelligence and remember to have faith.
When we observe our fear we gain perspective, we don't have to be right in it, being overwhelmed by it.
Here's some words from The Dalai Llama that I find helpful, maybe they help you too.
A given situation can be viewed as either unbearable or beneficial: it depends how we look at it.
We must make certain that things don’t begin to seem unbearable.
If we look too closely at problems we will see nothing else and they will appear all out of proportion with reality; that is when they become intolerable.
If we can stand back from them, we will be better able to judge them and they will seem less serious.
Don't look too closely at the problems. Stand back and remember it's all just a play.
wishing you flow
Some years back I became a fan of vulnerable. I'd previously not known this elusive feeling. I avoided it at all costs. I hid this natural human state behind anger, defensiveness, confidence, aloofness, ambition, drugs, alcohol and the list went on.
This was not a conscious choice. I was far removed from the authentic reality of vulnerability. My pain and hurts, I thought, were well hidden. As the years of self and spiritual development have evolved I have come to know the importance of embracing all of who I am. That includes the 'ugly' parts.
I thought vulnerability meant weakness, neediness and exposing one's most personal stuff. If I was vulnerable I could be hurt. Again. If I was still a child, or a young person with poor boundaries that would be true. In fact, even as a somewhat emotionally healthy adult there will be betrayals and the ensuing hurt. Where there is love there is also hurt. Being honest with that pain is being vulnerable.
Current popular thought on vulnerability is that it means to share our feelings and experiences with people we trust. People who are able to truly listen.
When we replace distance with the uncertainty and emotional exposure of vulnerability there is a possibility of getting hurt yet as we heal our wounded inner child we are able to be more discerning around such sharing. It doesn't have to mean leaving one's self open to being hurt like it may have once upon a time. With healthy boundaries and trusting our inner knowing we know who it is safe to share our most intimate self with.
When we are brave and courageous to allow our vulnerable self to come forward we -
Deepen our relationships.
Drop our defences.
Feel deeply connected to another.
Open our heart.
Show others our humanness giving them permission to do the same.
Access new levels of freedom.
Today I know vulnerability to be a beautiful and powerful place to spend some time. As I've matured I have come to understand and befriend this often elusive feeling. When I allow my vulnerable self to come forward in safe places I feel connected and authentic. I am aware of the genuine power that I can access as I honestly share my deepest truths. I can feel Real Love. I am also aware of how it affects those around me. We all become softer and more loving.
Vulnerability is your friend if you have the courage to meet it.
wishing you safety for your vulnerable self to be seen.